1 Step Forward 1 Step Back.

Every time I think I might actually be able to write something good about her father he does something to ruin it. He came back down this weekend to visit which would have be great if A: he had asked me about the dates before booking his flight B: if it wasn't the last weekend I would get to spend with my mom before she left. C: he didn't take out his frustrations on me and disrespect me (like usual) in the last few hours together. I gave up my time, and Marlowes time with her grandmother (who has been there for Marlowe in so many countless ways) to make time for him. Because like I've said many times before and in previous posts: I'm not going to stand in the way of their relationship if he is trying and it will benefit Marlowe. But of course he has no concern for any of that. It is only: how he wants it and when he wants it without concerning himself with other peoples needs or feelings. No matter how much credit I give him or how much time I make for him to be with Marlowe at my own expense he will always find a way to be hard, cold, and disrespectful towards me. But I guess, like the cold weather: it comes and goes and you just have to suck it up and deal with it for it's short inconvenient visit.
Not just in temperature and weather, but in everything: there is a reason why I love warmth and I despise coldness-- people don't like to feel that chill in their bones. How you love and your heart's capacity for giving warmth is set forth by how you were raised in your home. Luckily, Marlowe has nothing but love surrounding her... I just have to remember that a few hours he spends with Marlowe wont harden and chill her heart. When he leaves I have to pull myself together and remember there is a reason that I am the one that spends every day raising my daughter and he isn't... it is my job to show her what love really is. (&If he wants to argue with and tell me that he is there financially, then that is just fabulous considering he has sent one check --last week... the roof over her head and everything else she requires was given to her by me, my family, and friends. Whereas nothing was given to her by his friends, and most certainly not him or his family... but in their defense I'm sure they all have wonderful reasons for not supporting Marlowe-- a friends daughter, a daughter, and a granddaughter).

But lets move forward and focus on some good...
This weekend I told Marlowes father he would be able to come by all day Sunday and he should plan an activity to do with her. He had a few ideas in mind, but with the weather how it was we decided on the Norton making Sunday Marlowes first art museum experience. She was very alert and awake for Nick Cave's exhibit. His exhibit was amazing and perfect for a very alert and happy baby (or a color loving adult)... it was very bright and full of colorful large sculptures. She fell asleep not long after being in the museum, which isn't surprising considering she was in the baby wrap. I wish I could have taken photos when she was actually awake and alert, but photography was only allowed for their permanent exhibits... all of which she slept through.
One of the employees mentioned we take her to view the Dale Chihuly ceiling... which was a great idea, except Marlowe had fallen asleep by the time we got there.

(click images to enlarge)

Marlowe and I with other fun art:

And here is a short video on Nick Cave since I couldn't take any photos of his art:

We went shopping to find cute little pjs for her and went to a diner to feed the adults before heading to the museum. I had him come by Saturday morning before I spent my final day with my mom. And Saturday night he kindly brought hot coffee to help with the chilly weather and I had him help with Marlowe's bath time.... even though no help is ever needed because she lovessss bath time and is probably the easiest most bath-able baby ever. But like I said, those not-so-bad moments only last so long until he gives me a reminder of why I hate the cold so much--- People may believe they know what cold is and believe it is not that bad, but no one can ever be certain until they experience it for themselves.